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UPDATE: Jan. 11, 2022, 3:00 p.m. EST This story has been updated with the best sex toy deals from across the internet, including some enticing new price drops from Lovehoney’s collection.

• The We-Vibe Tango is a bullet vibe but better — $59 $79 (save $20)

• The Satisfyer Pro 2 is a suction toy that uses air pulses and vibrations, yet still keeps costs low — $39.95 $89.99 (save $50.04 with code NYSALE)

• The Lelo Ina Wave 2 is one of the best rabbit vibrators out there, thanks to its Wave Motion technology — $159 $199 (save $40)

We’re not saying that treating yourself to some new sex toys will almost certainly improve your life, but we’re also not not saying that. Spending some money on upping your solo sesh game or adding a little spice with a partner is well worth the investment. Though we do believe in springing for well-made toys since you’ll be putting them in, on, and around your genitals, that doesn’t necessarily mean you have to drop a ton of cash. Every week, we’ll be rounding up the best deals directly from manufacturers and online sex shops alike, so you can find a toy you’ll love, at prices you’ll love (almost) as much. Check out our finds from this week below.

Vibrator deals

Why we like it

Read more from Mashable about the We-Vibe Tango here.

Think bullet vibrator, but better. The We-Vibe offers the perfect pinpointed vibrations, with a flat-topped lipstick-shaped head that’s better than the rounded design you’ll find on most bullet vibes. It’s also waterproof and rechargeable, making it clear why Mashable culture reporter Anna Iovine deemed the Tango “the best bullet vibrator I’ve tried.”

More vibrator deals:

• Babeland Spritz vibrator — $7.99 $16 (save $8.01)

• Satisfyer Magic Bunny Vibrator — $29.98 $79.99 (save $50.01 with code NYSALE)

• Love Honey Bigs Bunny Girthy Rechargebale Rabbit Vibrator — $44.99 $89.99 (save $45)

• Original Magic Wand — $69.95 $99.99 (save $30.04)

• Lovehoney Dream Wand Rechargeable Mini Massage Wand Vibrator — $39.99 $79.99 (save $40)

• We-Vibe Tango — $59 $79 (save $20)

• Evolved Monroe Tapered Vibe — $74.25 $99 (save $24.75 with code LOVE25)

• Lelo Ina Wave — $143 $179 (save $36)

• MysteryVibe Crescendo vibrator — $171.75 $229 (save $57.25)

• Lelo Ina Wave 2 — $159 $199 (save $40)

• Lelo Soraya 2 — $175 $219 (save $44)

Clitoral stimulator and suction toy deals

Why we like it

Suction toys are great for those that love all the attention on their clit, but they can also be quite expensive. With the Satisfyer Pro 2, you don’t have to sacrifice quality for cost. Unlike other clit stimulators, the Pro 2 uses air pulses and vibrations (with 10 different vibration modes, by the way), so getting that just-right intensity is as easy as it should be. Plus, this USB rechargeable waterproof toy allows you to take those good vibes to the bath and shower without any worries.

More clitoral stimulator and suction toy deals:

• Mantric Rechargeable Rabbit Ears Clitoral Vibrator — $32.49 $64.99 (save $32.50)

• Womanizer Starlet 2 — $55.99 $79.99 (save $24)

• Better Love Tap Dancer — $69.99 $175.99 (save $106)

• Lelo Sona Cruise — $90.01 $137.99 (save $47.98)

• Lelo Sona Cruise 2 — $111 $139 (save $28)

• Womanizer Premium Clitoral Suction Stimulator — $149 $199 (save $50)

• Lelo Sila — $135 $169 (save $34)

Dildo deals

Why we like it

When it comes down to it, everyone will have their own preferences when it comes to dildos (or any sex toys, for that matter), but here’s why this one is worth a second look. The silicone material gives the dildo some flex, so you can find those just-right angles (which can feel even better thanks to its approachable size). The circular base doubles as a suction cup too, making this dildo easy to hold, fit into a harness, or stick on to the non-porous surface of your choosing.

More dildo deals:

• Lovehoney Realistic Suction Cup Dildo 7.5-inch — $12.49 $24.99 (save $12.49)

• Fifty Shades of Grey Feel It Baby Color-Changing Silicone G-Spot Dildo 7-Inch — $15 $49.99 (save $34.99)

• Lovehoney Pink Spiral G-Spot Sensual Glass Dildo — $18.49 $36.99 (save $18.50)

• Lovehoney Double Delight Adjustable Vibrating Strap-On Dildo — $24.99 $49.99 (save $25)

• Lovehoney Firm Friend Stainless Steel Beaded Dildo 6.5-Inch — $42.49 $84.99 (save $42.50)

• Le Wand Hoop Double-Sided Stainless Steel Pleasure Tool — $115.96 $145 (save $29.04 with NYSALE)

Deals on sex toys for penises

Why we like it

When it comes to sex toys specifically for people with penises, Fleshlight might just be the most recognizable name out there, and for good reason — they’re masters at the masturbation sleeve. Fleshlight’s sleeves have made our favorites list before, and this bundle comes with a compact version of one of the brand’s most popular sleeves, the Stamina Training Unit, as well as lube and cleaner.

More deals on sex toys for penises:

• Lovehoney Ring It On Rechargeable Vibrating Rabbit Cock Ring — $19.99 $39.99 (save $20)

• Honey Pot Textured Realistic Vagina Male Masturbator — $32.49 $64.99 (save $32.50)

• Tenga Egg Variety Pack — $35.10 $39 (save $3.90)

• Lovehoney Hot Shot Rechargeable Warming Male Masturbator — $44.99 $89.99 (save $45)

• Satisfyer Men Vibration Masturbator — $49.95 $84.99 (save $35.04)

• Satisfyer Men Heat Masturbator — $54.95 $79.99 (save $25.04)

• Buy 2 Fleshlight sleeves, get one free — $99.90 $149.85 (save $49.95)

• Lelo F1S V2 penis sleeve — $186 $219 (save $33)

• MysteryVibe Tenuto wearable vibrator — $211.65 $249 (save $37.35)

• Fleshlight Quickshot Launch Vantage Pack — $221.95 $246.85 (save $24.90)

Anal toy deals

Why we like it

Looking for a butt plug that’s beginner friendly but still offers a little something extra? This Lovehoney pick comes in an approachable size, has a nice curve for easier p-spot stimulation, has seven different vibration settings, and is completely waterproof. And you get all this versatility for just over $10.

More anal toy deals:

• Lovehoney Booty Buddy Silicone Butt Plug — $8.49 $16.99 (save $8.50)

• PinkCherry Graduated Anal Beads — $8.98 $24.99 (save $16.01 with code NYSALE)

• Lovehoney Booty Buddy 7 Function Vibrating Butt Plug 4-Inch — $12.49 $24.99 (save $12.50)

• PinkCherry Triple Trainer Anal Kit — $19.95 $59.99 (save $40.04 with code NYSALE)

• Lovehoney Inner Glow Jewelled Metal Butt Plug 3-Inch — $14.99 $29.99 (save $15)

• Lovehoney Get Started Beginner’s Anal Kit — $25.79 $42.99 (save $17.20)

• Lovehoney Seven Function Silicone Rechargeable Vibrating Prostate Massager — $27.47 $54.95 (save $27.48)

• Lelo Hugo prostate massager — $175 $219 (save $44)

Even more sex toy deals:

• Black Furry Hand Cuffs — $4.95 $19.99 (save $15.04 with code NYSALE)

• Strap-On Harness Kit with Realistic Dildo 6.5 Inch — $19.99 $39.99 (save $20)

Explore related content:

• What to look for when buying a sex toy

• Where to buy sex toys online (even at Target)

• The best budget-friendly sex toys under $50

UPDATE: Jan. 11, 2022, 2:55 p.m. EST We’ve gathered up some of the best deals from across the Apple universe, including the M1 iMac at its lowest price ever.

• BEST MAC DEAL: The MacBook Pro (M1, 8GB RAM, 512GB SSD) is a solid all-around laptop that can power you through all kinds of tasks, minus the premium price tag — $1,299.99 $1,499.99 (save $199.01)

• BEST REFURBISHED DEAL: iPhone 11 (64GB) — no matter your carrier or plan, you can score a good deal on this iPhone — $498 $569 (save $71)

• BEST IPAD DEAL: 2021 iPad Mini, a tiny tablet that packs a punch — $459 $499 (save $40)

• BEST IPHONE DEAL: The iPhone 13 Mini (64GB) at Verizon is a mini phone with plenty of storage space and a battery life worth bragging about — $0 with select trade-ins or BOGO with any unlimited plan $699.99 (save up to $699.99)

• BEST APPLE WATCH DEAL: The Apple Watch Series 7 (41mm, GPS) is the latest Apple smartwatch and on sale in a bunch of different colors — $369 $399 (save $30)

• BEST ACCESSORIES DEAL: The AirPods Pro are the perfect earbuds for staying focused — $189.99 $249 (save $59.01)

You could really kill some time trying to dissect the iron grasp Apple has on the general population, but when it comes down to it, its products look good, work well, and stay cutting-edge — of course people like them. Whether your favorite day of the year is its annual September reveal event or you just want a solid computer no matter the brand, Apple’s got you covered. Sure, it is a little notorious for its higher prices, but we’ve rounded up the best deals on iPads, AirPods, and more to help you out. Check them out below.

Mac and MacBook deals

Why we like it

Check out Mashable’s official review of the 2020 MacBook Pro.

Whether you’re a student, video editor, or simply a person in need of a laptop, the MacBook Pro is a great all-around pick. With its M1 chip, 13-inch Retina display, and a battery capable of powering you through the day, you’ll get why this laptop is a solid machine for many different kinds of users.

More Mac and MacBook deals

2020 MacBook Pro, 13-inch

• MacBook Pro (M1, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD) — $1,149.99 $1,299.99 (save $149.01)

• MacBook Pro (M1, 8GB RAM, 512GB SSD) — $1,299.99 $1,499.99 (save $199.01)

• MacBook Pro (Intel Core i5, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD) — $1,299.99 $1,799 (save $500)

2020 MacBook Pro, 16-inch

• MacBook Pro (Intel Core i7, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD) — $2,159.99 $2,399.99 (save $240)

• MacBook Pro (Intel Core i9, 16GB RAM, 1TB SSD) — $2,299.99 $2,799.99 (save $500)

2020 MacBook Air, 13-inch

• MacBook Air (M1, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD) at Amazon — $949.99 $999 (save $49.01)

• MacBook Air (M1, 8GB RAM, 512GB SSD) at Amazon — $1,149.99 $1,249.99 (save $100)

More Macs

• 2020 Mac Mini (M1, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD) — $599.01 $699 (save $99.01)

• 2020 Mac Mini (M1, 8GB RAM, 512GB SSD) — $799.99 $899 (save $99.01)

• 2021 24″ iMac (M1, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD) — $1,399 $1,499 (save $100)

Refurbished Macs and MacBooks

• Renewed 2019 21.5″ iMac (Intel Core i3, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD) — $729.99 $1,099.99 (save $370)

• Refurbished 2017 MacBook Air (Intel Core i5, 128GB) — $379.97 $1,400 (save $1,020.03)

iPad deals

Why we like it

Check out Mashable’s full review of the iPad Mini.

The iPad Mini is incredibly portable, looks like a cute baby iPad Air, and is speedy thanks to its A15 Bionic chip (a.k.a. Apple’s latest mobile processor). Since its release last fall, finding it in stock and on sale hasn’t been too easy. At the time of writing, only the space gray model was available at the sale price, so you’ll want to act fast if you’re interested in what Mashable senior editor Stan Schroeder calls the “best (small) iPad ever.”

More iPad deals

• 2021 iPad Mini (WiFi, 64GB) — $459 $499 (save $40)

• 2021 iPad Air (WiFi, 64GB) — $539 $599 (save $60)

• 2021 11″ iPad Pro (WiFi, 128GB) — $749 $799 (save $50)

• 2020 11″ iPad Pro (WiFi, 256GB) — $809.99 $899.99 (save $90)

• 2020 12.9″ iPad Pro (WiFi, 256GB) — $989.99 $1,099.99 (save $110)

• 2021 11″ iPad Pro (WiFi, 512GB) — $999 $1,099 (save $100)

• 2021 12.9″ iPad Pro (WiFi, 128GB) — $999 $1,099 (save $100)

iPhone deals

Why we like it

Check out Mashable’s official review of the iPhone 13 Mini.

If you’re picking up some new phones for more than one person this holiday, it’ll be difficult to find a better deal than this buy one, get one on the iPhone 13 Mini at Verizon. Though this model looks quite similar to its predecessor, the starting storage of 128GB and improved battery life definitely justify the upgrade.

More iPhone deals

• iPhone 12 Mini (64GB) at AT&T — $314.99 with a switch to any unlimited plan and no trade-in necessary — $629.99 (save up to $314.99)

• iPhone 12 (64GB) at AT&T — $15 per month for 36 months on an unlimited plan, then receive up to $190 in bill credits

• iPhone 13 (128GB) at AT&T — $0 with an eligible trade-in and unlimited plan $799.99 (save up to $799.99)

• iPhone 13 Pro (128GB) at AT&T — $100 with an eligible trade-in on an unlimited plan, with installed payment plan $999.99 (save up to $800)

• iPhone 12 Mini (64GB) at Verizon — $0 with a new line on an unlimited plan $599.99 (save $599.99)

• iPhone 13 Mini (64GB) at Verizon — $0 with select trade-ins or BOGO with any unlimited plan $699.99 (save up to $699.99)

• iPhone 13 (128GB) at Verizon — $0 with an eligible trade-in on an unlimited plan or BOGO with any unlimited plan $799.99 (save $800)

• iPhone 13 Pro (128GB) at Verizon — $0 with select trade-ins $999.99 (save up to $999.99)

Apple Watch deals

Why we like it

Apple’s newest smartwatch has a larger face, increased support for biking, and better durability. You can find it at this price in a bunch of different colors at both Amazon and Walmart, but get it nice and quick with that Prime shipping.

More Apple Watch deals

Series 7

• Apple Watch Series 7 (41mm, GPS) at Amazon — $369 $399 (save $60)

• Apple Watch Series 7 (41mm, GPS) at Walmart — $369 $399 (save $30)

• Apple Watch Series 7 (45mm, GPS) at Amazon — $399 $429 (save $30)

• Apple Watch Series 7 (45mm, GPS) at Walmart — $399 $429 (save $30)

SE

• Apple Watch SE (40mm, GPS) at Amazon — $229 $279 (save $50)

• Apple Watch SE (40mm, GPS) at Walmart — $229 $279 (save $50)

• Apple Watch SE (40mm, GPS) at Best Buy —$249 $279 (save $30 and get four months free of Apple Fitness Plus)

• Apple Watch SE (44m, GPS) at Walmart — $269 $309 (save $40)

• Apple Watch SE (44mm, GPS) at Amazon — $279 $309 (save $30)

• Apple Watch SE (44mm, GPS) at Best Buy — $279 $309 (save $30 and get four months free of Apple Fitness Plus)

Series 3

• Apple Watch Series 3 (38mm, GPS) at Best Buy — $169 $199 (save $30 and get four months free of Apple Fitness Plus)

• Apple Watch Series 3 (38mm, GPS) at Walmart — $169 $199 (save $30)

• Apple Watch Series 3 (42mm, GPS) at Walmart — $179 $229 (save $50)

• Apple Watch Series 3 (42mm, GPS) at Best Buy — $199 $229 (save $30 and get four months free of Apple Fitness Plus)

Refurbished

• Refurbished Apple Watch Series 6 (40mm, GPS + Cellular) — $355.95 $499 (save $143.05)

• Renewed Apple Watch Series 5 (44mm, GPS) — $290 $429 (save $139)

Apple accessories deals

Why we like it

Check out the official Mashable review of the AirPods Pro.

They’re not the latest AirPods release, but they’re still one of our favorite earbuds out there. With spatial audio, active noise cancellation, and interchangeable silicone tips, they certainly make for a more functional pair of buds than the third-gen AirPods.

More Apple accessories deals

• AirPods (2nd gen) — $109.99 $129.99 (save $20)

• AirPods (3rd gen) — $169.98 $179 (save $9.02)

• AirPods Pro at Walmart — $189.99 $249 (save $59.01)

• AirPods Max— $479 $549 (save $70)

• Powerbeats Pro Totally Wireless Earphones — $199.95 $249.95 (save $50)

• Beats Solo Pro Matte Collection — $199.99 $299.99 (save $100)

• Beats Studio 3 Wireless Noise Canceling Headphones — $208.82 $349.99 (save $141.17)

• Apple TV 4K 32GB — $169.99 $179 (save $9.01)

• Apple Pencil (first gen) — $84.99 $99 (save $14.01)

• Apple Pencil 2 — $114.99 $129 (save $14.01)

Explore related content:

• 8 monitors to take your MacBook Pro to the next level

• MacBooks aren’t the only great laptops — and this list proves it

• Best headphones for iPhone owners: Think outside the (AirPods) box

Save $150: The end of CES often means great discounts on TVs, including this 55-inch Hisense 4K TV, which is on sale for $499.99 at Amazon as of Jan. 11.

A lot of eye-catching new TVs were revealed at CES 2022. And while you might not buy a 98-inch monstrosity anytime soon, CES often means great deals on previous models that are more budget-friendly — and that actually fit in your living room.

One prime example is the Hisense 55-inch H9G Quantum Series 4K TV, which is on sale for just $499.99 at Amazon. That’s a savings of $150 and the lowest price we’ve seen on this model to date.

The Hisense H9G has a display with advanced Quantum Dot technology to showcase over a billion colors. That allows for bright and accurate 4K images. It also offers a high contrast range, Dolby Vision HDR, and 132 local dimming zones for up to 1,000 nits of peak brightness. This means it’s a great option if you prefer to watch movies and shows in dark rooms while still seeing every detail.

Gamers will appreciate this TV’s super-low input lag and fast response times. It makes streaming easy, too, with hands-free voice controls compatible with Alexa devices or with the built-in Google Assistant. That includes commands to turn it on or off, change channels, and search for your favorite shows.

Explore related content:

• The best TVs for gaming to get you to next-level play

• From Netflix to HBO Max to Disney+: The best streaming sites for movies

• Your TV needs a soundbar. Here are our faves.

Between never-ending seasonal allergies, an ongoing pandemic, and weather that always seems to be either too hot or too cold, going out for a run or heading the gym isn’t the most appealing thing to do every day. Home treadmills are a godsend for this exact reason. They’re a sweet, sweet solution for the days when it’s too gross, hot, or swampy to run outside, or the days when you don’t feel like brawling over a machine at the gym.

The pandemic brought a whole new meaning to shared exercise equipment and shared workout spaces. In Normal Times, existing in the sweat cloud of strangers was merely gross — but in Coronavirus Times, it could actually be dangerous. With gyms at limited capacities and certain machines blocked off to keep the distance, a quick cardio workout stopped being quick.

If your New Year’s resolution for 2022 involves getting more steps in, training for a marathon, or just getting more active without having to leave the house, we’ve rounded up the best treadmills on the market now. Read on for the guidance you need to make an informed home gym purchase.

What to look for when buying a treadmill

(For nitty-gritty shopping guidance on ideal treadmill motor and incline, scroll all the way down.)

Space will constrain a lot. A treadmill’s listing should offer weight capacity and dimensions — take the latter into consideration for your own body as well as the amount of actual space that it takes up on the floor. Shoppers looking for a small-space treadmill have foldable options to cut down the footprint in storage. Some fold like a “V” and some can fold completely flat to roll under a bed.

Another household-related thing to keep in mind is who’s using it. Is it for solo use, for you and your partner, or a whole family, maybe? Gym Source recommends shopping for the most extreme situation — i.e. buying the treadmill that accommodates the person with the widest build. Belt size and belt length come into play here: Belts should be between 18 to 22 inches wide, and opting for the larger end makes sense for beginners who can’t keep the center line or have gait issues. Belts should hit at least 48 inches long, though anyone over six feet tall should bump that to 54 inches for running.

Materials matter. High-end treadmills are expensive because they’re built to last. Granted, a steel frame is the standard for most, regardless of price — it’s under the hood where things get questionable. $400 treadmills might trade in metal gears for plastic ones that wear down easily or struggle to power the incline. Faulty wiring or tech that fails to adjust the resistance in each step can lead to a less-than-productive run. These factors are less of an issue if the treadmill will only be used for walking or very sporadic workouts.

How important is shock absorption in a treadmill?

Home treadmills of the past were often associated with a cacophony of a rattling frame, thumping belt, and the general clamor of a machine that’s about to fall apart, but modern treadmills have seriously evolved. While new treadmill models are generally built with sturdier materials and design than those of old, shock absorption is also abundant now. Shock absorption is huge for downing the noise of your treadmill and reducing the impact and strain on your joints, but models with heavy duty shock absorbing systems might require more frequent maintenance. On the other hand, smaller treadmills without shock absorption, a restrictive weight limit, and feebler low-end running decks can’t contain motion as well and are bound to rock or squeak.

Shock absorption is achieved with a few different tactics. Some use marshmallow-y rubber grommets under the surface to buffer footfall without interfering with push-off. Bowflex has engineered its own five-cell Comfort Tech deck cushioning system while NordicTrack and Proform spring you into the next step with cushions that foster energy return. Better cushioning also works to take some of the burden off your knees and joints. (NordicTrack’s force dampeners can even be turned off depending on how hard or soft you prefer your surface.)

Treadmill mats are also a popular impact-absorbing accessory, utilizing rubber’s bouncy properties to soften the blow underneath a wobbly machine.

Does a treadmill warranty matter?

In short, yes. According to NordicTrack, treadmills usually require the most maintenance over their lifetimes in comparison to other home gym machines. That means that a good warranty is a must. Because of how expensive treadmills are nowadays, you’ll want to protect your purchase by choosing one with a solid warranty. The best treadmill warranties usually cover the frame for 10 to 15 years, parts for one to five years, and labor for one to two years. At the bare minimum, pick a model with a warranty that covers everything for at least a year, so if you have any issues, you won’t run into even more financial costs.

What’s a good treadmill motor?

A motor with at least 1.5 continuous-duty horsepower (CHP) will be needed to keep up with relatively regular use, but most nice models will hit between 2.5 to 3.5 CHP. (The user’s weight will also help determine how powerful of a motor is necessary.) Motor energy can be measured in a few different ways, but continuous duty is the spec that matters most for treadmills. Continuous duty horsepower represents how much power is maintained throughout the workout (compared to say, peak horsepower, which represents the very max that the treadmill can hit but probably not maintain).

A powerful motor won’t determine speed as in how fast the belt can move, but the best motor for you will be dependent on how fast you’re trying to go: Walkers will be fine with 2.0 CHP, while 2.5 or 3.0 CHP would be better for jogging and running, respectively. High-intensity, large-bodied people might go with 3.5 CHP just to be safe.

What about a good incline?

Walking uphill sucks universally. Compared to toppling downhill with the force of gravity on your side, an incline forces you to lift your body weight against gravity, recruiting help from calf muscles, hamstrings, and glutes. If you’re looking to do more than get those steps in for the day — like build leg muscle and burn extra calories — look for a treadmill that can rise to a 15% incline rather than the traditional 10% to 12% max. Incline training machines dedicated to an angled workout also exist and can reach a 40% incline. A 2% to 5% decline is a nice bonus, too.

Live and pre-programmed workouts might be *the* deciding factor

Barring the select few who can deal with bird chirps as their marathon soundtrack, people who *like* running will probably even admit that it’s an activity best done with distraction. Music suffices for many, but indoors especially, having an on-screen workout to focus on often helps to push through the pain. Pre-programmed workouts can be as simple as automatic speeding up or slowing down of the belt in waves to meet targets like calorie-burning or distance training.

But for the Pelotons and NordicTracks of the world, the screens are getting bigger and the control panels are getting smaller. This is where you’ll access on-screen outdoor runs with gorgeous views or streams of live training from instructors who know how to pump people up. (Like a ClassPass session but without the paranoia of visible sweat stains.) Users can choose a workout by skill level and time. Subscriptions like iFit offer categories past traditional jogging: Choose a run that incorporates weights or take a break from high-intensity and be guided through an on-screen yoga session instead.

Most models have some sort of platform to hold a phone or a tablet if you want more stimulating entertainment, and none of this matters much if there’s a TV in the room. Access to streaming services on media-based treadmills is still somewhat rare (without doing the next best thing to jailbreaking and voiding your warranty), but some newer Bowflex models do play nicely with Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, and more.

Here are the best treadmills for home use in 2022:

I remember the first time I went to conversion therapy. If I’m honest, I thought it was quite nice really. 

The woman at the reception of the church hosting the therapy had me sign in on the visitor’s sheet. Then, I went upstairs to meet a guy who would be able to “help me,” or so I was told. We had a cup of coffee and talked for almost an hour, and I thought he was a kind, helpful person. Sure, some of the things he said made me cry and I’d told him things that I’d never told another human being, but that was part of it all, right? It was 2011, I was in my final year of university, 21 years old, desperately unhappy and quite obviously not straight. My life was spiraling, and over the following months it would only get worse. But I was doing all the things I was told would help me — the light had to be at the end of the tunnel soon.

The thing is, I wasn’t told it was conversion therapy. It wasn’t until about six or seven years later I had a lightbulb moment that the sessions I had with some unlicensed ‘counsellor’ on a sofa in a church with the sole stated intention of suppressing my sexuality did, in fact, fall under the definition of conversion therapy. It was only after I realised this that I began to retrace what happened that year and the depths to which my mental health declined, and was finally able piece things together.

If you grew up in an environment where queerness in any form was not only discouraged but labelled as morally wrong and perverse, attending a place that claims it can change what you’re feeling might seem like the logical, if not the only, choice you have. You don’t have to grow up in a fundamentalist religious cult to feel this way, but it certainly helps. When the pastor in my church — who (quite worryingly now I think about it) often liked to talk to me about my “homosexual struggles” — presented the idea that I go along to this meeting with a guy from another nearby church, everything seemed to be above board. “I’d really like you to push past [your sexuality] and change,” he said to me. This felt like the most natural way to think and talk at the time: At last, there was an easier way of dealing with my sexuality than being miserable about it all the time!

Conversion therapy is based on two ideas. One: that any sexuality or gender expression that deviates from heterosexual or cisgender is wrong (or at least undesirable) and two: that a person’s sexuality or gender expression can be changed or suppressed. Both of these ideas are unsubstantiated, if not simply factually incorrect and harmful. The first is simply a bigoted position — labelling sections of humanity as “undesirable” purely because of difference — and the second is not backed up by science. In fact, it’s actively discredited by science.

According to Stonewall and the UK National LGBT Survey in 2018, seven percent of LGBTQ people have been offered or undergone conversion therapy, with the number almost doubling for trans and asexual people. In the U.S., UCLA School of Law Williams Institute released a study in 2018 estimating that 698,000 adults had received conversion therapy, with 350,000 of these people having undergone conversion therapy while they were under 18. This is a staggering amount of people given that in the UK and the U.S., all major counselling and psychotherapy bodies, as well as the National Health Service, have concluded that conversion therapy is dangerous and have condemned it, with the International Rehabilitation Council for Torture Victims going as far as to brand it torture, and the U.N. Human Rights Council’s report recommending a global ban on conversion therapy.

“But who would willingly send themselves off to conversion therapy?” is the question my friends often can’t get their head around, and to be honest, it’s a solid point. The little that we do hear about conversion therapy involves incredibly aggressive, distressing situations ranging from physical abuse to electroshock therapy. While these versions of conversion therapy do still take place, according to a Human Rights Council report, the more common variety of conversion therapy in Europe and the U.S. will be led by a faith-based institution, meaning a sort of talking therapy that will involve prayer and religious advice. However when looking globally, it is medical and mental health providers who are the main practitioners of conversion therapy in almost half of the cases, and state authorities can also be involved. These treatments can range from homeopathic treatments to medication or hormone therapies, as well as the previously mentioned more violent and cruel abuse. People can feel so coerced by their families, their doctors, and even the authorities where they live to change who they are that some people pay large sums of money to be subjected to these “therapies”. 

In the UK, it is still legal for LGBTQ people to be subjected to conversion therapy, but the government is currently running a consultation on legislation to ban it. Stonewall has stated that the proposed ban must have zero exceptions — it must include religious settings and it should be inclusive of trans people. With the fact that governments such as Brazil, Germany, and 24 U.S. states now have legislation outlawing or are currently in the process of drafting the laws to ban conversion therapy, it seems to those on the outside that attending it must contain an element at least of coercion. 

The therapy itself was, now I look back on it, both laughable and deeply disturbing. I don’t know if you’re familiar with the method often employed by con artists, psychics, and mentalist illusionists known as “cold reading,” but it is essentially fishing for information while seeming to only ask innocent questions. This man could see that I was a sensitive, ticking emotional time bomb and so he slowly and calmly primed me before pushing all my buttons at once. “When did you first see your mother cry?” he asked me, quite casually in the middle of the first session. Until that point, I’d never spoken of that memory to another person, and something like this is obviously going to be an emotional touchpoint for anyone, especially if the memory was from a young age — I was four. “How did that make you feel?” he continued. As I sobbed to a man I’d only met minutes ago, he calmly explained that this level of emotion was because I was naturally empathetic and compassionate — both excellent qualities, he reassured me — but that my “deviance” in sexuality was because I interpreted these emotions as sexual attraction. I believed him.

The ‘therapy,’ though it leaves a bad taste in my mouth to even call it that, continued in this way over a few sessions. What I remember of it are these statements that what I was feeling was not necessarily bad, I was only misinterpreting it, directing my feelings in the wrong direction. What I needed to do, I was told, was to remember that only sexual attraction to women was natural and that I should distrust other attractions and learn to tune them out in my head. My mental health predictably took a nosedive. I went from being simply miserable at my situation as a queer man trying to work out if my sexuality could fit with my faith, to truly despising my lot in life. I hated that I had to deal with these feelings, and I raged at myself. These emotions quickly manifested themselves as vivid and shocking suicidal dreams, and I began to contemplate harming myself. At this point, I hit the panic button and reached out to someone I trusted.

I remember the pale shock on his face as I calmly detailed how low I felt — to me all of this was normal. I couldn’t be ill, I was getting help! Thankfully, he told me in no uncertain terms that I had choices. Even though he was himself a leader in a Christian group I was involved with, he explained I could choose which way I wanted to go, even if it meant abandoning my faith. His frank honesty, his insistence that the current path I was on was troubling and clearly not the right one, and his genuine care for me, allowed me the space to come to my own conclusions. He made sure I was in contact with friends who would care for me primarily as a human being and not a soul to be ‘saved’ and altered. He offered resources and community support groups led by other Christians who were LGBTQ, but only if I wanted to attend and in my own time. It was his support and this knowledge that I had choices that allowed me to step back and say no, I didn’t want to spend my life struggling to find ways to marry my faith and sexuality. While many LGBTQ people do live wonderful, fulfilling lives of faith, this was not for me. So I left my faith, setting me on the path I’m still on today. I began to learn to love myself, and to work towards choosing to be happy. Without a doubt, this man saved my life.

“Realising that I was allowed to enjoy the personality, the sexuality, and the humanity inside me was the greatest revelation of my life.”

How could all of this come from some benign-looking meetings with a random guy? Since sexuality cannot be altered, nor is it a choice, how did this quackery have even the slightest effect? Conversion therapy is, at its core, simply emotional manipulation. “Change because God wants you to” or “because your family wants you to” or “because your life will be better.” There are so-called ‘success’ stories from various conversion groups where ‘ex-homosexuals’ talk about how they have overcome themselves and now live heterosexual lives. Absent from most of these spurious testimonials, however, is the idea that they are ‘cured’ of their queerness. Most will talk about how they now simply repress themselves — though perhaps not in such terms. Suppressing your own personality, your life, the parts of yourself that make up who you are, is the bedrock of conversion therapy. It’s no wonder that this has clear and dangerous effects on a person’s mental health. So much so that, when previously interviewed about my time in conversion therapy, I was unable to accurately answer how many times I had attended, or give more detailed reasons of what it was that set off the alarm bells in my head. My memory of those days is, mercifully, full of gaps, and I have no recollection of month-long stretches in 2011. After speaking with a therapist, I was told that memory loss is a common symptom of stress and anxiety or a response to trauma. Not only this, I was told, but attending sessions of conversion therapy, or any other incorrectly directed therapy, can not only lead to trauma around the event but also a lasting distrust and fear of mental health services that can impact decisions around a person’s health for years to come. 

Stonewall has a very clear and simple line on conversion therapy: “No one should be told their identity is something that can be cured.” As someone who went through it and almost didn’t make it out the other side, I can only echo this. 

What I can say for my own part though, is that my life after conversion therapy with all the normal ups and downs, struggles and triumphs that life brings, has been the best I could ever want it to be. I left my faith behind, struck out on my own, and I got to become the person I am today — to discover who it was that I was suppressing. While I began the journey alone, I am not now by any means. My friends, my partners, and the people I meet on my queer journey have become, as we so often hear about, my chosen family and support network.

Realising that I was allowed to enjoy the personality, the sexuality, and the humanity inside me was the greatest revelation of my life. To anyone who has thought about or is thinking about conversion therapy, I say this: Never subject yourself to something that, by its very nature, seeks to remove part of yourself that is good. I did, and not only did it not work, it simply wasn’t worth it. Only by learning to accept and express myself did life truly open up to me — and I can’t thank the people around me enough who put me on this path.

If you want to talk to someone, the TrevorLifeline provides free, confidential counselling for LGBTQ people. To reach a counsellor, call 1-866-488-7386 or text START to 678678. If you’re in the UK, here is a list of LGBTQ mental health helplines. Here is a list of international resources.

Picture this: You found the love of your life on Tinder. Amazing, right? At least, until he cons you out of thousands of dollars.

What sounds like a nightmare is actually a true story, and it’s the focus of Netflix’s upcoming documentary film, The Tinder Swindler. The titular Tinder Swindler has conned women across the world, and he is a fugitive from justice in several countries. Now, three of his victims are trying to get revenge.

Will they win out against the man they fell for? Or will they uncover darker secrets along the way? We’ll find out when this true-crime documentary film from the producers of The Imposter and Don’t F**k with Cats’ debuts next month on Netflix.

The Tinder Swindler hits Netflix Feb. 2.

SAVE $150: If you’ve been looking for a pair of noise-canceling headphones for travel or your morning commute, the JBL Tour One Wireless Headphones are a solid choice. As of Jan. 11, they’re on sale for half off at Amazon, which means you’ll pay $149.95 (original price: $299.95).

Whether you want a good noise-canceling pair of headphones for air travel or just for playing “Emotions” by Mariah Carey over and over again at work, the JBL Tour One Wireless Headphones are a great pick. They’re also on sale for 50% off at Amazon.

These wireless Bluetooth headphones support frequencies up to 40hHz, have a battery life of up to 50 hours (25 hours in noise-canceling mode), and are compatible with Alexa and Google Assistant.

The noise-canceling experience is also customizable. JBL’s True Adaptive noise cancellation will process external noise and filter it out for an immersive listening experience without distractions, but you can allow ambient noises to filter through if you wish.

Explore related content:

• Look to sound quality and battery life when shopping for new headphones

• JBL updates its portable speakers with fresh look and USB-C

• 10 of the best wireless headphones, according to Amazon reviews

The U.S. Treasury issued the first coin in its new, special collection honoring notable American women, rolling out a new quarter featuring famed poet Maya Angelou on Monday. It’s the first time a Black woman has appeared on the coin in its centuries-long history.

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The American Women Quarters Program is a four-year initiative that will issue several coins featuring prominent women in American history, spanning the areas of “suffrage, civil rights, abolition, government, humanities, science, space, and the arts” and with attention to “ethnically, racially, and geographically diverse backgrounds,” according to the program’s website. 

A few of the coins will be released in 2022 with the rest following through 2025, the U.S. Mint announced. The program, aided by the Smithsonian Institution’s American Women’s History Initiative, National Women’s History Museum, and the Congressional Bipartisan Women’s Caucus, selected the honorees from a list of submissions collected from the public last year. The 2022 coins include depictions of astronaut Sally Ride, first female principal chief of the Cherokee Nation Wilma Mankiller, suffrage leader Nina Otero-Warren, and Chinese American film actress Anna May Wong. 

Angelou’s coin depicts her with arms outstretched and a large bird and rising sun behind her. It’s intended to honor her as an artist, poet, and activist. “Each time we redesign our currency, we have the chance to say something about our country — what we value, and how we’ve progressed as a society,” U.S. Treasury Secretary Janet L. Yellen wrote in a statement about the new coin. 

While the program is a small bit of positive news for women, especially women of color, under the Biden administration, some online made it clear that this government announcement is quite literally cents to the dollar. The new coin is mainly a symbolic gesture — more than 200 years after the 25 cent coin came into use, women, especially Black women, still face daily discrimination and structural barriers, like pay gaps. 

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Others pointed out they were also still waiting on a proposed change to the current $20 bill, featuring the image of abolitionist Harriet Tubman, which was reintroduced under the Biden administration last year. 

The move to scrub the country’s racist forefathers from its currency, and replace them with images of women of color, is a complex decision — perhaps needed, but the smallest of tasks in a long list of required institutional change. 

You aren’t meant to envy You Will (Not) Remain‘s depressed protagonist. Trapped alone in their apartment complex while an eldritch horror overtakes the city outside, there isn’t any contentment to be found in their drastically shrunken, dingily claustrophobic world. Still, I felt a twinge of jealousy as I moved them through their monotonous cycle from bed, to kitchen, to balcony, to bed.

“At least,” I thought, “nobody expects anything from them.”

Created in 48 hours for the 2021 Women Game Jam, Bedtime Phobias’ You Will (Not) Remain is a 2D indie game which examines mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, and isolation. The 30-minute roleplaying game doesn’t have any puzzles to solve, answers to find, or days to save. There are simply days in which to exist, repeating the same patterns over and again with no anticipation that it might ever change.

It’s an experience that is unfortunately familiar in our pandemic-altered world, at least to those of us fortunate enough not to work on the frontlines. Just as You Will (Not) Remain‘s unspeakable abomination keeps its protagonist confined to their building, the COVID-19 pandemic has also kept us indoors while extracting a similar psychological toll. Even the game’s ominous public service announcements are familiar, warning citizens to stay inside and not let anyone in.

The rote rituals carried out in the shadow of inescapable dread and overwhelming depression are easily recognisable. Oh, there’s an all-consuming terror engulfing my city and devouring all that was once joyous or comforting? I guess I’ll water my plant, because at least that’s something to do.

Same.
Credit: You Will (Not) Remain / Bedtime Phobias

“After facing another lockdown after nearly two years of them, we decided to make a game that explored our collective experiences with isolation from each other and the world,” You Will (Not) Remain‘s narrative designer Gabriella Lowgren told Mashable. Based in Melbourne, Australia, her team had been excited to collaborate in person, but were forced to do so virtually after the city went into lockdown again.

“I felt that writing a story purely about lockdown would be too raw for both us and our audience, so decided the game needed an external reason that could be a stand in for the pandemic,” said Lowgren. “I personally love eldritch horror (as does the rest of the team) and our artist [T-Dog eXtreme] knew that it would be a strong visual motif. Thematically it ended up working, and the strong visuals are a key part of that.”

While You Will (Not) Remain‘s focus is clearly on narrative, the mindlessly simple gameplay is effective in reinforcing its dark themes. Walk to the plant, interact with it. Walk to the coffee cup, interact with it. Walk to the strange monster-dog, interact with it. Run out of things to interact with, go to bed because there is nothing else for you to do. Though an omnipresent Lovecraftian being looms overhead, it is simply set dressing to the horror of stark existence. Is this all there is? Is this all there will be? 

You Will (Not) Remain is a timely, relatable snapshot of many of our mental states after countless prolonged pandemic lockdowns. Still, despite how relatable and effective its marriage of themes and gameplay is, it does exclude one element that has made the pandemic experience so distressingly unbearable: the expectation that we still function. The protagonist may be starved of human interaction, but they also weren’t panicking about their productivity after staring blankly at a coffee cup for an hour.

The world seems to be crumbling before our eyes, but food needs to be cooked, jobs need to be performed, the show must go on. We continue because that is what is done, because that is what is left. In some ways these tasks give us a sense of purpose and structure, a way to mark time amidst a homogenous stream of it. But in others, they narrow our existence to routine labour and weigh down our already crushed souls until we forget we were once more than this.

We are dust and to dust we will return. I just kind of thought I’d be dead when it happened.

Also same.
Credit: You Will (Not) Remain / Bedtime Phobias

Lowgren hadn’t considered making You Will (Not) Remain‘s protagonist work from home, but thinks it would have detracted from the sense of solitude they wished to convey.

“I think if they worked from home there would be a clear sign that there was still life in the world, and I wanted them to be completely isolated,” said Lowgren.

As such, there is a strange, almost desirable comfort in the certain uncertainty of You Will (Not) Remain‘s societal collapse. The game’s protagonist has no sense of purpose, trapped in hopeless listlessness. But at the same time there are no demands laid upon them, no thought that they should be upskilling or hustling or continuing as normal in abnormal times. They are allowed to break down with little consequence, a luxury few are afforded. It’s simultaneously suffocating and freeing. 

They don’t have a name, but there’s nobody who might call it if they did. It’s likely been months since they last smiled, with no cause to do so even as a facade. Everything is falling apart, and there is no respite on the horizon. Yet all they need to do is quietly water their plant, feed their dog-monster, care for themselves, and wait for a change. It’s far from a good situation. Still, in some respects, it’s enviable.

You Will (Not) Remain is currently free to play on Steam.

If you want to talk to someone or are experiencing suicidal thoughts, Crisis Text Line provides free, confidential support 24/7. Text CRISIS to 741741 to be connected to a crisis counselor. Contact the NAMI HelpLine at 1-800-950-NAMI, Monday through Friday from 10:00 a.m. – 10:00 p.m. ET, or email info@nami.org. You can also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Here is a list of international resources.

In 2017, Lindsay Melbourne had never heard of the British-Irish rock band Idles. In the five years since, she’s unwittingly helped launch one of the most vulnerable and inclusive fan communities online today.

Melbourne — a talented photographer out of Yorkshire, England — was asked to photograph Idles’ launch show for their debut studio album, Brutalism, in March 2017. Her husband and friend had seen the band live before, but she wasn’t particularly familiar with their work.

“That was when they kind of changed everything for me,” she told Mashable.

It was only her second year working in music photography, but Melbourne realized quickly that Idles wasn’t getting the coverage they deserved. There weren’t any other photographers at their shows, which are notoriously rowdy and, occasionally, violent. It’s the kind of concert where the audience brings just as much action to the show as the band does on stage.

“Their performance has an incredible energy that doesn’t hold back in intensity but remains conscious of the audience’s experience,” Parker Alexander, a 20-year-old from New York City, told Mashable. He’s seen the band twice. “The 2019 show I was right behind the pit, but not in it. Seeing the movement and excitement of the crowd from that perspective is unreal.”

Joe Talbot, the vocalist for Idles, describes the live shows as “magic.”

“The violence of our live show is a beautiful thing and it’s a thing of visceral love and wanting to be loved that is immeasurable, really,” Talbot told Mashable. “It just is magic and it’s not something you can replicate without pure love. And that’s what we have.”

That kind of energy can be a photographer’s dream. So Melbourne started shooting as many Idles shows as she could.

“I started to get to know the band really well, and they got me on board to do some press photography and some promo shots,” Melbourne said. “And I also started to get to know all the fans. A lot of people were doing the same as me — they were traveling around to different cities in the UK to go and see the band.”

Idles during their live show
Credit: Courtesy Lindsay Melbourne Photography

Like many communities of music fans, the people got really close. Everyone started “buddying up” and going to gigs together. She thought it would be helpful to start a group online that would be able to help connect people to go to shows together and share some of her photography. So she went to Facebook and started the ALL IS LOVE: AF GANG (IDLES Community) page.

She was close with the band members, and Talbot — who isn’t on social media at all himself — actually came up with the name.

“It’s like, the As Fuck Gang, as in a group of people who are willing to put themselves out there and be enthusiastic about life. One of life’s cheerleaders. Be fucking vivid. Don’t hide behind whateverness. It’s bullshit. I’ve always been hungry and I think it’s important to show that, and that’s why I called it AF Gang,” Talbot said. But that was all he had to do with the creation of the community. Melbourne created the page on Facebook, and the fans have made it what it is today. “They’ve come to our shows and they’ve supported us, and they’ve created a whole network of people with the philosophy of hopefully acceptance and empathy as a tool to kill fascism.”

Be fucking vivid. Don’t hide behind whateverness. It’s bullshit.

Fans creating online communities to celebrate bands and music isn’t specific to Idles in any way. The “Jeff Rosenstock I Look Like Shitposting” page, for instance, is delightful. And because the pages are created and managed by fans, they’re typically friendly communities. But the rarity that sets AF Gang apart, is the way they talk about things that seemingly have nothing to do with Idles’ music — particularly mental health issues. That didn’t happen immediately, but once the group got rolling, there were passages and posts from people talking about how to deal with the death of a beloved pet, their nervousness about going to a show alone, or the loneliness and isolation that so often comes along with the pandemic, all among discussions of the band.

“But knowing that they were going to meet some AF Gang members [at shows] made them feel comfortable,” Melbourne said. “Naturally, people just started to talk about them and to health and their stories and their journeys.”

The group started with about 50 people, and it stayed that way for a long time. Once the band started playing bigger shows, the group grew with them  — slowly, at first. Now, there are more than 31,000 members of the private group. And, somehow, they maintained the ethos of kindness from the original page.

“Four years down the line, I feel like there is a real family in there,” Melbourne said. “It almost says that they’re brothers and sisters, and if someone goes through something, you feel it too, and you just want to be there to support.”

Much like the organic growth of AF Gang, everything about the Idles community happened naturally. Talbot didn’t go out looking for a group of fans who would love his music and his message  — it’s just what happens when people listen to the lyrics, show up to the shows, and vibe with each other.

“I don’t think every artist should ever feel a necessity to do anything for their audience, but the whole reason why I started music and I started art was because I was saving my life because I felt isolated and my loneliness and my vitriol towards the universe and its randomness led me to drug abuse, violence, and other things that led me down a pathway that I could have not lived much longer,” Talbot said.

That’s when he started DJing and, later, writing music and working with the other members of the band — Adam Devonshire, Mark Bowen, Lee Kiernan, and Jon Beavis. “I realized that my focus wanted to be on making sure that I never felt alone again through vulnerability and through openness and catharsis. And that came with our rock music and our live act. It’s still there now.” 

Slamming a cucumber at their live show
Credit: Courtesy Lindsay Melbourne Photography

Dr. Hae Joo Kim, assistant chair of professional music at Berklee College of Music and an expert on fandoms and how they impact artists’ success, told Mashable that when musicians show this kind of immense vulnerability in their music, “fans will respond in kind.”

“The fans, when they’re meeting, going on social media, and going on all these apps, and websites, and platforms, and seeing all this vulnerability, there’s a certain relationship that builds there and they themselves become vulnerable to the group and with the group — in a very one-directional way, obviously,” Kim said. “And then a community goes across the fans. So there’s this, like triangulation.”

And Idles fans aren’t just communicating with vulnerability on Facebook — their fan pages all over the internet are filled with the same vibe. Alexander, the fan who described seeing Idles live as “unreal,” has been one of the moderators for the Idles subreddit for nearly four years. He says the Reddit community feels like a “great extension” to the “communal aspect that you experience at their shows.”

“It’s the band’s consistent message contained in the lyrics of the betterment of one’s self and leading with joy and compassion that creates a strong base for the fans to stand on and pick each other up,” Alexander said. “The original fan group on Facebook also set the standard for others to follow when it comes to leading with kindness regardless of background.”

But it didn’t happen without some bumps. 

“It was this perfect, sweet, amazing little place on the internet for about two years,” Melbourne said. And then Covid happened. Lockdowns ensued. Everyone was spending more time on the internet. “There were people coming in and kind of trying to cause trouble.”

The ethos of AF Gang is that all is love — but it’s hard to love the trolls. “We are this all-encompassing, all is love vibe and we’re not gonna just going to kick people out. So it was quite hard managing these situations where members were feeling uncomfortable.”

Melbourne realized she needed more people to help moderate. For the first two years of the group — in a world before COVID — there was no political talk allowed.

But as the group grew, Melbourne said she couldn’t play gatekeeper or ban any topics. At first, it caused a bit of blowback, but she found that the group eventually settled. For every post about Brexit or the U.S. elections, there was one about someone’s mental health journey. “There was still all that love that people wanted to share and support, and that ultimately brought people back together again,” Melbourne said.

For Idles, all is love
Credit: Courtesy Lindsay Melbourne Photography

To help foster that community, the moderators manage AF Gang in the most Idles way imaginable — by listening to everyone’s point of view before making any big decisions.

“Even if someone’s coming in and they’re being quite angry, there are probably reasons behind that,” Melbourne said. “So just trying to be as open as possible and trying to encourage everyone to listen to each other, but it’s much easier than it sounds. It’s been really hard, but I think in the last year, it seems to have gone back to that place where it was when we first started.”

All of this kindness and vulnerability might feel at odds with Idles’ music if you’re paying attention only to the aggressive sound and not at all to the aggressive — but tender — lyrics. It’s the kind of music my mom would hate to hear across the house, bleeding out of my room, but would love to see written as a poem. Pitchfork described Talbot as “modern post-punk’s most voracious life coach,” and his music as delivering sensitive and introspective moments” with the same bull-in-a-china-shop aggression and lack of subtlety as their protest-placard rockers.” There’s a violence to their vulnerability.

“The violence that we put in our art is supposed to remind people of the humanity of it,” Talbot said. “One of the worst things that has ever happened to our society is advertising companies convincing people that imperfection is wrong and that everyone’s ugly, everyone’s too old, everyone’s too fat, everyone’s too poor, and you can invest in buying into a dream that will not ever succeed because perfection can’t exist in the human race. And we wanted to just bring back a sense of belonging through the violence of everyday life and celebrating imperfection.”

Whatever the opposite of toxic positivity is — they have it. And the new album — which has moved away from their past albums baiting their haters — proves that.

“The new album is incredible and the lyrics are really strong,” Melbourne said. “It feels like a really lovely place to be.”

In the closing line of the last song of the newest album, Crawler’s “The End,” Talbot continues to see the lotus in the swamp. “In spite of it all,” he growls, “life is beautiful.”